You ask: “Shouldn’t we be ruthless when running a business? There are wolves out there!”

This is easily one of the top debates I’ve had with fellow entrepreneurs and small business owners. Fans of movies like The Wolf of Wall Street, hold your horses—I’m talking about small business owners here. While ruthlessness and compassion don’t have to be mutually exclusive, for the sake of argument, let’s go hypothetical.

I’d say my life has been much better since I learned to be compassionate, became a good listener, and adopted a servant leadership model. Yes, this works for me, but it may not work for everyone. I’m not here to teach—just to share my story.

The Soup That Taught Me a Lesson

In 2009, when I opened the first location of my soup and sandwich quick-service restaurant, I was still very much an engineering- and procedure-centric guy. I wrote detailed standard operating procedures (SOPs) for all my signature soup recipes, which seemed straightforward and easy to follow—at least to me.

Every day, while the alleyway behind our tiny hole-in-the-wall store was still dark and quiet, our micro kitchen crew of three started at 4 a.m., prepping fresh produce, making stocks from scratch, and cooking our four signature soups of the day. The sound of soup simmering and the clanging of stainless steel pots and pans created a mini symphony in my 65-square-foot kitchen—a beautiful melody that still brings back fond memories.

I usually arrived at the store around 7 or 8 a.m., by which time all our soups were almost done, and we were about to start breakfast service. I still remember the morning when I stepped into the kitchen for my usual taste test. I tasted something different in my beef goulash soup… and my rage went from 0 to 100 in 0.1 seconds!

I couldn’t understand—why couldn’t they just cut the vegetables the way I showed them? Why couldn’t they use the measuring cup? Why couldn’t they just follow the timer? Why couldn’t they just follow my SOP? It’s so easy! WHY?!

Right there on the spot, I scolded them at the top of my lungs, using words I wouldn’t imagine saying today. The outcome? They all dropped their aprons and left.

Starting the very next day, and lasting for two months, I had to wake up at 3 a.m., be in the kitchen by 4 a.m., and man the entire kitchen myself—until I finally found the next crew to take over.

What Did I Learn?

First, I learned that yelling doesn’t make soup taste better. Second, I realized that people aren’t robots. Procedures and rules are important, but understanding why people struggle to follow them is even more important. Maybe the SOPs weren’t as foolproof as I thought. Maybe my team needed better training. Maybe—just maybe—being a good leader isn’t about demanding perfection but about fostering an environment where people feel empowered to do their best work.

I also learned that compassion isn’t about being soft—it’s about being smart. When employees feel valued and understood, they’re more likely to stay, learn, and improve. When customers see that you genuinely care, they come back. And when you show yourself some grace, you’re more likely to build a business that’s sustainable—not just in profits, but in personal well-being.

The ROI of Being a Decent Human Being

Compassion isn’t just good karma—it’s good business. Employees who feel valued work harder. Customers who feel heard keep coming back. Vendors who respect you might cut you some slack when cash flow is tight. I’ve personally experienced all three scenarios. And let’s be honest—the world could use more business owners who prioritize kindness over cutthroat competition.

I’m obviously not suggesting we should all hold hands, sing “Kumbaya,” and expect our businesses to magically thrive. But what I’ve learned is that doing good set a foundation for me to focus on my business’s core mission, which ultimately allowed it to grow steadily.

So, the next time you’re dealing with a tough situation, take a deep breath, channel your inner Zen master, and remember: a little compassion goes a long way. And if all else fails, a well-placed joke and a smile can do wonders.

After all, business is tough—but so are you. And being kind while you hustle? That’s the real power move.

For those who insist you need to be ruthless, I hear you. But most of them aren’t small business owners. They’re high-paid professional managers, operators, and CEOs. The tales of Wall Street are real and understandable—they’re required to behave that way because that’s their job. Their livelihood depends on maximizing the top and bottom line for shareholders. Period.